What's a Girl To Do?

I've been asked a few times in the last several months to pick this blog back up again.  I've wanted to, but so many things in my life have been changing lately that I've been trying to focus on the things most important to me. 

I use to get up at 4:30 am each morning and get my daily workouts out of the way.  It was incredible; I felt amazing each day and ready to take on the day with a clear head.  Not to mention, I didn't have to wait for the beasty, sweaty mirror hogs to let go of any weights.  Things are different now though, and instead I spend these mornings alone helping my little mini-me prepare for her day at school.  By the end of my work day, I pick up my kiddo and am exhausted and drained from the day.  The last thing I want to do is go to a gym full of 400 pair of stale, sweaty socks.

I've also had to limit my time with my amazing personal trainer, Natasha.  There are other cuts I had to make, including going from two gym memberships to one, and not being able to afford $150/week in groceries just for me.  My body is showing signs of being affected by this already.

Just a few weeks ago it seems, I had some incredible tone and definition, and was pretty lean (some pics in my previous post).  Now when I walk, it feels like something is smacking my rear each time and I need a wheelbarrow for my belly jelly. 

I'm embarrassed and uncomfortable with my shape.  No, it doesn't really look like I've lived in a McDonald's parking lot for the last year but I certainly look nothing like I had just a month ago. 

There's something to be said of this common phrase of making fitness and healthy eating a lifestyle choice. 

I was in the best shape of my life.  I felt amazing, and loved every minute of not being sick, lethargic, slow, etc.  I was healthy.  But now, here I am figuring out how to wade through my new set of options and to be honest, there are times when I have felt like throwing in the towel. 

Let's say I do that.  I mean that's a choice, right?  No one is going to judge me for getting a backup beeper and learning how to suck in for photos.  After all, I am 31 years old, have had a child and people will just assume the years have taken their toll.  But that's not me.  It's not who I am. 

Health and fitness really is an incredible way of life.  God gave me this body; no amount of lame excuses should keep me from taking care of it.  Plus, what better defense is there against Obamacare?

I'm not going to lie; it was embarrassing going to the gym last night and doing legs.  I was nervous because it's a bright gym and it was sure to be full of people.  To top it off, I saw people I knew; friends and even girls I had trained with.  Oh it gets better... my trainer, Natasha, was even there and spoke with me.  Talk about feeling like flab next to her fab!

Somehow though, I survived.  I sweated a lot.  And I pushed some decent weight on legs. Tonight, I'm going to sit down and figure out what my schedule and meal plan is going to be.  And yes, it is going to include Vi!  I'm excited, because this sick and tired feeling that I feel right now as I write this... well that feeling is about to be a thing of the past.  Here's to moving forward and into a healthier me!

=)
Amanda